Can money buy happiness?

How much money do we need to be happy? Do we need to be well-off? Do we need to buy all sorts of toys and gadgets? Happiness lies not in how much we can buy, but rather results from our dominant thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Our thoughts create our feelings and drive our behaviors. Thinking mostly positive thoughts leads to happiness.

Happiness means different things to different people. Some might say it’s power, fame and fortune, others eating or watching their kids grow up. These things can all help make us happy, but happiness is really an intangible emotion. It’s a state of mind. It’s feeling joyful. It’s the absence of sadness and the presence of positive emotions such as contentment, peacefulness or excitement. “Can money buy happiness?” is like saying “Can money buy sadness, anxiety or anger?”

Buying happiness

We buy all sorts of things to make us happy. We’re really buying things that may or may not lead to happiness. We might instead feel sad, angry, fearful, stressed, indifferent or resentful. Why? It’s our thoughts, attitude, perception etc towards what we buy that determines whether we feel happy or not.

Let’s use an example. Say I buy an expensive car to make myself happy. I enjoy driving it, and I feel happy as a result. Another person might buy the same type of car. They, however, worry so much about crashing it and scratching it that it causes them anxiety. This fear off-sets the happiness they wanted from the car. We could use any number of examples, from watching a comedy act to buying a meal, to illustrate this point.

Some might say, “If we aren’t happy, we aren’t shopping at the right places”. There might be truth in this, but I believe that ultimately happiness is from within and cannot be bought. There are happy rich people and unhappy rich people. There are happy poor people and unhappy poor people.

Does the amount of money we have correspond to how happy we are? Probably not. Surveys have found nearly the same level of happiness between the very rich individuals on the Forbes 400 and the Maasai herdsman of East Africa.

Depression is on the increase

You might think, “If we had enough money to buy the best therapists, houses, food… then we would be happy.” Many rich people buy these, yet they aren’t all happy.

Plenty of people are materialistic; they get into credit card debt buying anything from expensive sofas to stereos, to make themselves happy, yet depression is on the increase.

The World Health Organization says depression is the 4th most disabling condition in the world, and the 2nd most in the developed world. It is growing in all age groups, in nearly every community. At the rate of increase, by the year 2020 it will be the 2nd most disabling condition in the world.

The excitement wears off

Beware of thinking that you won’t be happy until you buy that certain something. This is allowing external items to govern your happiness.

Happiness from clothes, cars and other items can be short-term. Once the initial excitement wears off, more things are needed to sustain happiness. In extreme cases this can lead to addictions to shopping or worse. For some, even if they buy lots of something, it never feels like they have enough. They can buy more and more but the “gap” inside isn’t filled.

Winning the lottery

The initial excitement of a lottery win can result in happiness, but is it long-term? It appears not. Professor Martin Seligman, Director of the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania, says lottery winners eventually revert back to the usual level of happiness they had before their win. Matthew Herper, from Forbes, reported that they return to this level after five years.

Gaining long-lasting happiness

Enjoy the things we purchase, they can bring us extra happiness, but let’s not rely on holidays, cars or anything else we can buy to make us happy. For longer lasting happiness, invest in our lives from within rather than investing in things we can buy.

Our thoughts, beliefs and behaviors largely shape our lives, create our future and affect how we feel. Consistently think and behave in positive ways to gain extra happiness.

Follow “the light” – love, kindness, peace and other positive elements. Forgive others. Deal constructively, not destructively, with anger. Banish jealousy, hatred and resentment. Be kind, compassionate and generous. Pursue your dreams and be passionate about life.

… Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want.”

– Margaret Young, American Singer, 1900 – 1969

written by Nyomi Graef

References:
Depression, 2009, World Health Organization,
http://www.who.int/mental_health/management/depression/definition/en/

Herper, M, 2004, Money Won’t Buy You Happiness, Forbes,
http://www.forbes.com/2004/09/21/cx_mh_0921happiness.html

Seligman, M, 2006, Staying happier for longer, BBC News,
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/programmes/happiness_formula/4903464.stm